This week, I bring you links about how we sabotage ourselves when we’re younger, and how we can do better. I also bring you an article about the 25 most influential marriages ever and another on accents and why we try to take on new accents. There’s one that’s a little controversial about population control, another on how to fall in love with anyone; why our brains are so terrible at remembering names; the proper way to brag and some more interesting links.
The Downside of Being Competent
While it makes sense to rely more on competent people, Koval says that it’s important for co-workers and partners to recognize how much stress they are putting on those people by doing so. In the workplace, she recommends giving rewards to the responsible employees. Similarly she recommends that romantic partners pitch in, and give credit where it’s due
Why Humblebragging Doesn’t Work
Two fundamental goals in life are to get people to be impressed by us and feel sympathy for us,” said Michael Norton, a professor at Harvard Business School and co-author of the paper Humblebragging: A Distinct–and Ineffective–Self-Presentation Strategy. “People think they can get the best of both worlds by being indirect. Instead they are perceived as insincere.
ello everybothy, let’s talk habout hassents
Anyway, I’ve always found the subject of accents to be very interesting. From conversations that I have had with many people (usually Americans), most don’t realize they have one until they are around a bunch of people who don’t speak like them. In fact, even when they’re confronted by the reality that everyone has an accent, some of them still believe that theirs is the baseline by which others must be judged. That kind of cognitive dissonance most apparent in their looks of disbelief when I reply the usual “But you don’t have an accent,” questions with a sharp rebuttal about how they would sound foreign to the British ears if they visited England.
What if there are just too many people on Earth? – (Or thoughts on population control)
Part of the challenge is that the topic is now politically fraught both for the right and left. “On the right, if we’re talking about the demographic trajectory of the human family, inevitably, this brings up questions of sexuality, abortion, immigration, women’s rights, gender equity—all kinds ofhot button issues,” he says. “And then on the far ends of the left spectrum, there’s a radical fringe that has tried to portray family planning as equal to coercion.
3 Ways You’re Making Your Life Harder Than It Has To Be
The apple, of course, can be substituted for anything in your life: any event, any task, any social interaction, any person, any meal, any thought at all that enters your mind, anytime and anyplace. If you approach any of these with expectations of “how it should be,” they will surely disappoint you in some way… or be too plain and unexciting to remember. And you’ll just move on to the next disappointment or unexciting experience, and the next, and the next, and so on and so forth, until you’ve lived your entire life stuck in an endless cycle of things you barely like or barely even notice.
To Fall in Love With Anyone, Do This
The questions reminded me of the infamous boiling frog experiment in which the frog doesn’t feel the water getting hotter until it’s too late. With us, because the level of vulnerability increased gradually, I didn’t notice we had entered intimate territory until we were already there, a process that can typically take weeks or months.
We all have a narrative of ourselves that we offer up to strangers and acquaintances, but Dr. Aron’s questions make it impossible to rely on that narrative. Ours was the kind of accelerated intimacy I remembered from summer camp, staying up all night with a new friend, exchanging the details of our short lives. At 13, away from home for the first time, it felt natural to get to know someone quickly. But rarely does adult life present us with such circumstances
We’ve hit the peak of ‘free’ on the Internet. It’s time to pay up.
Yet the Internet won’t survive until people start paying for the things they find on it, which cost money to produce and distribute. This is a particularly painful reality for media companies, who debate paywalls with the intensity of medieval bishops parsing scripture.
Free is bait. It’s supposed to get you hooked. If you’ve played many mobile games, this pattern might be familiar. It’s called “freemium,” in which companies offer their apps at no cost and then charge for the good stuff once you’re addicted. (This model is also popular among drug dealers.)
Rounds Special: Exclusive Interview With GEJ
I don’t know what you’re talking about. There’s fuel in my house. There’s diesel in my generator, which I never use because there’s constant electricity. Look, GEJ was working. Nigeria was working. That is before you people voted me out.
15 Tricks to Appear Smart in Emails
In the corporate world, there is no ground more fertile for appearing smart than the rich earth that is electronic communication. Your email writing, sending and ignoring skills are just as important as your nodding skills, and even more important than your copying and pasting skills. Here are 15 email tricks that will make you appear smart, passionate, dedicated and most of all, smart.
How to Calm Your Nerves with “Mental Rehearsal” and Get Through Anything
We worry about things because we feel like we’re not fully prepared for them (even if we actually are). In its most basic form, mental rehearsal is a way to convince yourself that you are prepared. It’s the process of identifying the source of your worries, determining how you can adapt if things go bad, and “practicing” all of your contingency plans in your mind until you feel so prepared that your worrying melts away.
Keep in mind, however, that mental rehearsal is not just self-affirmation or “positive thinking.” In fact, parts of it can be the exact opposite. Mental rehearsal is more similar to what Wellesley College Psychology Professor Julie Norem calls “defensive pessimism”
This Is Why You’re Terrible With Names
There is a very simple reason why it’s so easy for the names of new acquaintances to slip right out of your head within moments of being introduced: Names are kind of meaningless.
It’s much easier, on the other hand, to remember a person’s occupation, a phenomenon memory experts call the Baker-baker effect. (As in, it’s easier to remember someone is a baker — perhaps because you’ve formed a mental image of your new acquaintance in a kitchen, covered in flour — than it is to remember that his or her last name is Baker.)
These are the 25 most influential marriages of all time
Talk about marital chemistry. And physics. Working side by side in Paris, the Curies were pioneers in the study of radioactivity, without which we would have no x-rays, no ability to kill microorganisms in food, no sterile medical instruments, and, oh, by the way, no nuclear reactors.
5 Things to Do For Your Career in Your 20s That’ll Pay Off in Your 40s
I have officially reached that point in my career at which I can reflect back and say, “Ah, yes. I’m so glad I did that when I was 25. It sure is paying off now.” And on the flip side of this very coin, I’m also at the “Oh, man. Why did I not consider that 15 years ago?” stage of life.
While there is plenty that one does not need to have all figured out in the early career years, there are a few things that every 20-something professional should get a handle on sooner, not later. Why? Because they may very well lead to big-time dividends by the time you hit your 40s