If I Could Write Poems

*insert apologies for not posting for about a year and insert excuses about school, work, life etc*

*also insert something about clearing cobwebs and sweeping the floor*

So a few days ago, I finally wrote something unrelated to work for the first time in about a year. Enjoy.

If I could write poems, I’d write of darkness
Warm, comfortable, soothing darkness
That hides the pain, tears and shame
Scary, frightful darkness
That drags you in and sinks your soul

If I could write poems, I’d write about boys
Boys I like, boys that like me
Boys I’ve loved and boys that have loved me
Boys I’ve hurt and boys that have hurt me
Boys, beautiful boys,
Beautiful boys that’ll hurt me

If I could write poems, I’d write about love
Fleeting love, unrequited love
Unconditional love, God’s love
Love so potent, so real, it feels warm like an embrace
Redeeming love; so freeing, so beautiful
Love that asks nothing of me
Love that’s patient, that is kind, that is forgiving

If I could write poems, I’d write about depression and pain
Suicidal thoughts, feelings of hopelessness
Pain from hurt, pain from hate
Pain from the cuts I carve on my skin
I’d write about the feel of my blood, warn against my skin
as it pours from cuts like bands against my wrist

If I could write poems, if write about me
My body. My beautiful, fat, dark body
I’d write about struggles with weight and appearance
Shame, disgust, the feeling of taking too much space
Wanting to hide myself – to swallow myself whole
Retreat into myself, disappear, take up less space in the world
Then love. Loving my beautiful body
Acceptance, confidence, understanding
Looking in the mirror and seeing perfection
No shame, no hate, just love for this beautiful work of art
Rejecting negative comments. Filtering the hate
Loving myself

Monthly Round Up: July 205

Hi guys,  I know I haven’t posted in like 2 weeks, but life has been hard, and school has been busy.

My laptop is bad. Which is why I haven’t been doing “Links I Love“.

School resumed fully in July and it was a flurry of assignments and presentations. July made me realise that I had discipline.

I didn’t watch a lot of movies or read a lot of books, but I read a lot of articles on webpages. Results for first semester are rolling in. I’m on good standing. We thank God. I hope it continues this semester. I have at least one assignment every week and the courses are really tough. Even tougher than last semester.

I watched “Big Eyes” a movie about an artist. She married this guy she believed to be an artist and he started to steal her work and pass it of as his. She went along with it for a long time and she finally got a divorce from him after he tried to burn her and her daughter with her paintings.

I’ve been watching “Boston Legal” a law series. It’s old. It’s hilarious and the main characters are the best.  I finished Seasons 1 and 2 in 3 days. That was about 40 1-hour episodes. I had to take a break because school + my laptop,

I really can’t remember much else of July because I usually put everything in the sticky notes on my laptop. I’ll start using Evernote for this now.

My hostel is shit, and I’ve had enough. I’ve been managing to get by with the hostel for a little over a year, but I can’t deal anymore. Can’t stay here for two more years. Help me.

I started reading Lace by Shirley Conran. Apparently, she’s the original Jackie Collins. I’m enjoying the book sha.

Also, I’m planning on doing a Harry Potter book and movie marathon for August.

Interesting Links
1. Mindy Kaling: And 16 Other Feminist Buzzwords. An interesting and funny post on feminism.
2. How To Buy Happiness. Transcript of a TED talk. Money really does buy happiness, but not in the way you think
3. It’s the Year 2145 and All Nigerians are Feminist. Great satire from one of my favourite blogs.
4. 15 Crucial Packing Hacks to Keep Your Wardrobe Fresh and 21 Uses for Plastic Baggies When Travelling. For the travellers amongst you.
5. Teen Girls and the Persistence of Gender Stereotypes. We believe that gender stereotypes are coming to an end, but are they really?
6. How to be More Like Misty Copeland. Because Misty Copeland is the definition of awesomeness.
7. Serena Williams and the Black Truths She Embodies. and Kareem Abdul-Jabbar: Body Shaming Black Female Athletes is not Just About Race. Surrounding the whole Serena Williams is masculine
8. Is Donald Trump Pulling a Nigerian 419 Scam. But is he? Really?
9. What is a Computer Anymore
10. The Hard Truths of Ta-Nehisi Coates. #LongRead
11. This article on how to be married for 5 years
12. This thinkpiece on female solidarity and the hypocrisy of it. (Reference: Taylor Swift-Nicki Minaj debacle).

Links I Love: Volume 9

Hello people, this week I bring you stories on what happens when you give a tree an email address; why we should start eating bugs (hint: the earth is running out of food); a short history of British slavery era (because most people don’t remember this); the secrets of crying babies and car alarms; how to come to terms with your attraction to fat girls; when moving up endangers your health; how sleep deprivation affects the mind and body; why it’s difficult to acknowledge emotional abuse; the unfair requests we make of geniuses and lovers; how not liking things on Facebook changes what you see; the captivity of motherhood; #BeingFemaleInNigeria; reasons why Nigerians [should] detest homosexuality;how misogyny retards the growth of our nation and more.
Continue reading

A Few Thoughts (and Questions) on Game of Thrones [or a Guide to watching GoT]

I had heard a lot about GoT. I had never watched any episode up until a couple of weeks ago, but I knew many of the characters and some of the plot line from Twitter and constant conversations. I have the books and I wanted to read those first before starting the TV series, but at the behest of someone, I decided to go ahead and watch it. After all, I had the complete series (Season 1 – 5). Before I go into my thoughts (and questions) about GoT, I’ll just say that if you haven’t watched it, you should.

Game of Thrones is (loosely) based on a book series by George R. R. Martin

The first thing you should know, if you decide to watch GoT, is that everybody dies. EVERYBODY. You’ll become accustomed to the phrase: “valar morghulis” which translates to “all men must die.” They take this very literally on GoT. So save yourself some heartbreak and tears and let it sink in: EVERYBODY DIES. When you start to love a character, get ready for his/her demise and if they don’t die, get ready to have high blood pressure, because they will always escape death, but barely, only to die later on. EVERYBODY DIES.

Okay, now that you’ve gotten that. In the beginning, it might be difficult to keep up with all the names and families, but before long you’ll catch a hang of it.

Things to note:
The Lannisters are the richest and possibly the most powerful family in Westeros (the medieval “country” GoT is set in). Westeros is ruled by a King/Queen. As at where the story picked up, it’s Robert of house Baratheon. He is married to Cersei of house Lannister. He’s a philandering drunk. He used to be noble and strong before the love of his life Ned Stark’s sister was raped and killed by one of Targaryens . He has three children who aren’t really his. They are Jamie Lannister’s childre. Jamie is Cersei’s brother. Robert won the throne by usurping the mad king a Targaryen. He fought with Eddard Stark (also referred to as Ned Stark) his best friend. Ned Stark is the Lord of Winterfell (which is basically the whole of the North) has 5 children including his bastard Jon Snow. His other children are Rob, Sansa, Recon, Arya and Bran. The head of the Lannisters is Tywin Lannister. Asides Cersei and Jamie, he has another son, Tyrion who is the family disgrace. His mother died while birthing him, he’s a dwarf (often referred to as the imp), also a philandering drunk, mostly no use in battle, but he’s very smart, reads a lot and has a very sharp mind. Their trademark is “a Lannister always pays his debts”. For the Starks (and basically all of Westeros who believe that the White Walkers exist) it’s “Winter is coming”. Another important family that you won’t see until around Season 3 or 4 is the House Tyrell.

House Targaryen was one of the most powerful houses until all their dragons died. There are only three people left, but one of them is in the Night’s Watch (the people that defend the North from wildings and WhiteWalkers. Mostly rapists and thieves, but also people with nowhere else to go and disgraced or banished Lords.) The other two are Daenerys Targaryen and her brother.

I really enjoyed the series. I watched all 5 seasons in about a week. Anytime I had my laptop out, I was watching GoT. I really like Daenerys. I really like how her character grew from a scared, docile girl to a strong, brave (but sometimes stupid) woman. She may be young, and stupid sometimes, but she’s very brave. My other favourite characters are Jon Snow and Tyrion Lannister. I don’t really know why I like Jon Snow. He’s just a very likable character. I think I’ve already mentioned why I like Tyrion.

Another thing to note: Almost everybody wants to sit on the Iron Throne

the iron throne - a game of thrones

Random note: Lisa Aryn is mad

So, unto my questions after the end of Season 5.

1. WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT SEASON FINALE? WHAT THE FUCK? I would just like to begin Season 6 with the face of Jon Snow and definitely not as a White Walker.

2. Did Sansa and Theon/Reek survive that jump? I really hope they did and I hope she finds Brian of Tarth(?) before that psycho Ramsey Bolton finds them.

3. Can someone kill Littlefinger? Nothing will bring me greater joy. He’s such a slimy bastard. I don’t like him at all. Especially because of what he did to Ned, and well, everybody.

4. What happened to Robert Baratheon’s last bastard? Haven’t seen him since he escaped from the Lady Melisandre. And speaking of her, what happens to her and her “lord of light”.

5. What happened to Daenerys? Was she captured or did her dragon save her?

6. What happened to Recon and Osha. We haven’t seen them since they separated from Bran, Hodor and the gang?

7. What’s next for Arya Stark? and did the Hound really die?

8. Also, what happens to Cersei, the Tyrells and the High Sparrow? What was Cersei thinking giving him all that power? That was a very stupid move on her part and I knew it would come back to bite her in the ass,

9. Does Jamie discover that his daughter was poisoned? If yes, does he go to take revenge on the people of Dorne?

I think those are all my questions.

Do you watch Game of Thrones, what do you think about it so far? What are your predictions for Season 6.